Friday 18 October 2013

Squishy

I don't know about you, but I have one of those hearts.  They are not super reliable in public places, in the sense that they can easily run over.  If your heart feels too much, you may fit into the squishy category.  It's the kind of heart that makes you hold on for too long, it makes you literally want to squish someone or something that you love.  Because the love itself becomes too overwhelming.

How wonderful (and painful) to be able to feel all these things.

More often then not, these emotions can arise when you are greeted with unexpected loyalty or companionship.  Also known as nearness.  This morning, as I was having my tea and trawling through blogs, my pet bunny came to keep me company.  Didn't do or demand anything, he was just there.  Oh, my melting, overflowing, unreliable heart.  That the love of a little critter can start my day off so beautifully.

Anyway, I realise that it sounds like I got into the punch a little early for a Friday.  This will follow later.  But I hope someone else out there has the same kind of start to their weekend.  A weekend of nearness and overflowing hearts.  What more (except some punch) can we possibly ask for?


Monday 30 September 2013

Spring


So, I realise that the official first month of spring is on its back.  And gardens are supposed to be in bloom.  And spirits lifted and all things happy.  Sorry if it has taken me a while to get into the spirit.  But shopping around on Etsy this morning, as I often do, I found this beautiful birdie.  And it made me feel like spring was real.  Bring on babies of all sorts, new beginnings, decluttering, and a fresh frame of mind.  Yeah!



Wednesday 4 September 2013

Words




Being pregnant is weird.  And, if you haven't been pregnant, there is a certain feeling that will be difficult to understand.  It is one of iktsuarpok.  And, whilst I don't spend a lot of time outside, the ache of anticipation is the same.  Especially in the home stretch.


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Thursday 29 August 2013

Make a wish


Close your eyes.  Make a wish.
There is a chance that this wish will give you hope, if not anything else.
It could just give you something to hold on to when you feel like slipping.
I'm not talking about the kind of wish that you would make when you blow out your birthday candles.
It's not the kid of wish that allows your childhood dream of a new bicycle.

This is the kind of wish that only has to do with matters of the heart.  
It deals exclusively with things you can feel.

There is a special kind of wish that I would like to make.
Maybe it's more of a prayer.
A hope for something to hold on to. 
A wish for a soft blanket to be swaddled in.
A safe place.



Friday 23 August 2013

Read




A dear dear friend recently surprised me with a couple of books.  Now, getting any mail that doesn't require fetching your chequebook is already a bonus.  Getting a piece of escape pie in the post is an absolute treat.  

One of the books included in my lucky packet was "Great with Child : letters to a young mother" by Beth Ann Fennelly.  Not only is the cover beautiful (packaging always gets me), but these letters felt so personal.  It is as if they were written for me.  The emotion is so real and honest.  And, somehow the telling of simple daily happenings feels like advice from a friend or a mother.  Someone you can trust. 

I cannot wait for the next friend to find out that they are with blessed bump.  As this book will be my go-to gift from now on.  

Make love



Its the weekend!  Well, Friday at least.  Yeah!  This weekend I plan to sleep late, have breakfast at a new bakery, relax and generally be useless.  And, I will try to follow the above advice.  It seems that, more often than not, being kind gets you the same response in return.  And who wouldn't mind getting smiled at every now and again?

Have a delicious weekend.  Make love.

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Thursday 1 August 2013

Paper hats



Am I the only person who can hear the wrapping paper?   I can almost smell the gravy, being built out of 4 hours of juice delivering cooking time.  In fact, I think I will dig out my paper crown, just to make sure that it still fits.  

Christmas could be my favourite time of the year.  I harbour no fear for the festive season weight gain.  I welcome it.  No, I do not want to be fat.  But I feel that, in this special time with family and friends, you get to stock up on all the good feelings you will need to get you through the new year.

Here we are.  August.  So close and yet......do you think people would think I was strange if I started to assemble my Christmas tree.  I suppose so.  Maybe I will just fetch it from storage.  And dust it off.  

I long to feel that magical feeling.  24 hours a day.  Its too late for Christmas in July.  But I suppose it's never to early to start making a list........


Monday 22 July 2013

Testing

I did it.  I took the plunge.  And now I am scared.  Afraid. Nervous.

I got a new bunny to replace the old one that died.  But now, I am unsure.  What if this bunny isn't nice to my boy bunny.  What if she is mean and won't play?  The ache of a bunny lost can be compared in a strange way to the ache of worry that comes with a new bunny.

I wonder if moms worry about the same kind of thing when bringing a new baby home.  What if they simply cannot get along?

It is possible that the emotional state of mind that comes with being pregnant makes all these changes all the more difficult?  All in all, it just makes me want my mom.  Weird as it may seem.

Wednesday 17 July 2013

Tribute



People do things for all sorts of reasons.  They wear black armbands to signify respect for someone who has passed.  They drink way to much at a wake.  They write songs, they erect hideous gravestones.  I let my bunny sleep in my bed last night.

I suppose a little background information could help here.  I recently moved (again) to a house with a wonderful garden and pool and space and light and air.  I should also add that I am a bunny lover.  My husband and I spent our weekend doing bunny proofing.  We even installed a baby gate, so that our buns could not make their way to the road.

All this preparation and schlep was, however, repaid in a way that I really did not expect.  I found one of my bunnies in the pool yesterday morning.  There was no hope for rescue.  I held her for about an hour, swearing at the world for being a cruel and unfair place.  I wrapped her in a towel and dried her.  Stroked her.  Agonised.

Her friend, partner and father of her babies refused to eat for the rest of the day.  See, he way paying tribute.  Because hurt - and the willingness to show it - could also be a form of tribute.  

He was so sad that I refused to leave his side.  I paid tribute to my beautiful little girl bunny by letting her friend sleep in my bed.  Not that he wanted to sleep.  Playing, licking, running was more what he had in mind.

But, as mourning and sadness may last all night, joy arrived in the morning.  In the form of a renewed appetite.

Pikpik will get a new friend in time.  But for now.  We are all happily (with the occasional tear) remembering his friend.

Friday 5 July 2013

Sparkling weekend!




So, the smell of weekend and waffles is in the air.  I have just discovered that my sandwich machine is also a waffle maker.  Score!  And, my dear dear friend just had her first proper contraction.  She actually had to sit down, it was so strong.  Come little baby darling.  We are ready for you!  What a great weekend this will be!  Waffles, babies and house hunting!  Enjoy!!

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Wednesday 3 July 2013

Feelings


Now, let me begin by stating that I am by no means psychic.

I am, however famous for buying clothes and wearing them straight out the shop.  I am impulsive and cannot wait for things to happen.  I own my own toolbox.  That way I never have to wait for a man to hang pictures on my walls, change plugs etc.

Bearing my very patient personality in mind (and this lightbulb only came to me retrospectively), I hesitated to start decorating my new babyroom in my new house.  We have lived here 5 days now, and I have not even unpacked any baby stuff.  Please understand that I'd already hung paintings and unpacked everything else in the rest of the house the very same day of moving in.

So, in this retrospective frame of mind, I received a very interesting phone call earlier today.

It seems my landlord has sold the unit we only just moved into.  And, my options are to either move out by the end of the month, or to move in 6 months.  And, not wanting to move with a newborn, I suspect I better get packing.  Thank goodness there is one room I didn't unpack.  Funny thing these feelings.  Best we trust them more often...........

Monday 24 June 2013

Happy colour.

I was digging around on Etsy, as I often do, and I found a couple of happy crafty images.  They made me smile.  As Monday rolls around once again, I figured a bit of colour wouldn't do any harm.  Hope they make you smile too!







Saturday 22 June 2013

Gestures

The Webster dictionary describes a gesture as "a movement usually of the body or limbs that expresses or emphasises an idea, sentiment, or attitude".  I like gestures.  Simple showings of how you feel.  

This morning, a beautiful gesture delivered breakfast to me.  In bed.  The sentiment could not have been sweeter.  Even though breakfast consisted of tea and toast, it made me feel like a princess.  




Friday 14 June 2013

Tea?





Many things can be done in autopilot.  For instance, you don't really have to think about sorting washing.  Before you know it, you've done it.  Perhaps because this is one of the most mundane parts of your day.  Or perhaps because you've just done it so many times.  My brain makes tea.  Without thinking, the first thing I do when I wake is fill the kettle.

And, I'll have you know, that the first cup hardly ever counts.  It's the cup you have while you wake up.  You are in autopilot, getting ready, feeding people.  The first real cup happens when everyone has left the house.  And you can really sit down and enjoy it.  Tea is the thing that gets you through the day.    Happy? Tea.  Sad? A soothing cup of tea.  In fact, my dad recommends tea for most states of mind.  Unless its after the work day - when, obviously, a glass of wine is in order.

That being said, I'm not denying coffee its rightful place in the world.  I'll be the first to admit that I can spend hours waiting if I have a good cuppa.  But there is something like home about tea.

Tea is the thing that puts you to bed at night.  And, considering the beauty of it, I will also admit that I hardly ever use beautiful dainty cups to drink my tea out of.  They are simply too small.

Think of all the pots of tea you've had with friends.  How it kept you talking for hours.

Tea, glorious tea.

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Thursday 13 June 2013

Good thoughts

I saw this poster on a friends Facebook page and I had to share it.  Imagine if the right mindset was really as easy as tearing the appropriate strip off a page.

 

Friday 7 June 2013

Force feed.

I am the kind of friend that can be compared to a mother bird.  There.  I said it.

I demand a lot of time.  I don't mind if you are in your pajamas, doing a grocery run or redoing a child's room.  I will happily pick up a paintbrush.  I don't always have a sense or appreciation for the time of day. There is a good chance that I will wake up and think - I should have coffee with a friend.  And I will send messages to invite said friends.  At 7am.

Sometimes I get the idea that I am force-feeding the friendship.  I have no issues with asking if I am getting in the way.  I expect my friends to be honest enough to tell me to back-off.

I suppose little birds do get sick when they get fed too many proverbial worms.  But isn't that what friends are for?  To clean up when our friends aren't well?



Say cheese!

Friday mornings.  They bring so much positive energy they they could possibly provide electricity for my whole house.  It's finally the weekend.  And whilst other people might be planning where to meet for that well deserved after work drink, I have only one thing on my mind.  Cheese.  Lots and lots of it.

 The menu will be simple.  Toasted cheese.  With some tomato, if I'm feeling wild.  Happy weekending!!



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Monday 3 June 2013

Ships


I recently attended a wedding where the best man made a speech starting with (corny, I know) "there are big ships, there are tall ships..................but the best of these are friendships."  And, in my life at least, I think this motto should be written on my sleeve.  

I'd like to add to that very profound speech that some ships may sail.  And, truthfully, you may feel hurt and betrayed.  And it will suck.  

But then there are the goodies.  The ones that never leave.  The ones that you can spend 3 straight days with, unpacking boxes, doing grocery shopping, drinking coffee and often too much wine.  Those are the ships worth buying a hat for.  


Per-spec-tive




I don't know about you, but I tend to find myself in dark clouds.  Ones where I weigh up what my life is about and the things I've done.  Ones where I compare myself to the Sex and the City girls and find myself far less fabulous than I had wished.

To banish these dark clouds, one literally needs to "get your head out of the gutter".

Easier said than done.  I did, however read a friends blog, and found the message (or kick in the head - the same one that loves to wonder gutters) to be so inspiring.  Her post described a feeling or past time that I often indulge in.  It's the one where you make little lists of the things you just don't like about yourself.  And the effect those feelings have on others.

Then I realised something.  Sometimes it's ok to make those lists.  It's even ok to read them out loud.

As long as you remember to tear them up.  And remember to "gain the confidence to be the star in your own life".

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Saturday 1 June 2013

How strong are you?


Crying.  Often seen as a sign of weakness.  Now we know the truth.  I've been crying more that I should recently.  My husband likes to say that I'd probably cry if I watched an ice cream ad.  And he is probably right.  Hormones.  A preggy side-product I never really took seriously.

Wednesday 29 May 2013

Bonded


There is something so special that exists between a mother and a daughter.  It's a bond that allows 2 hearts to speak to each other without words.  It is something magical.

A mother holds our hands and our hearts.

Often, my mother and I send each other the same message at the same time.  Some people will say "great minds", but I think that maybe it's more a case of same minds.  Now that I am expecting a daughter of my own, I can only pray that we will have the same kind of bond.  Secretly I wished that I would have a girl.  As there are so many relationships with so many wonderful women in my life that I would like to carry on with her.  To teach her how to set a table.  How to keep her heart safe.  How to skip, to dance.

I can only pray that the strength and wisdom that I've learnt from my mom will channel through me.  Quirks and all.

Mother, daughter and some wisdom from here.

Cake

There is something really comforting about baking and eating your own cake.  This recipe is wonderful, because you probably have most of the ingredients in your house already.  And it's really easy!


Ingredients
2 cups flour
¾ cups cocoa powder
1 ½ tsp baking powder
pinch of salt
1 cup milk
1 tsp vanilla essence
2 cups sugar
½ cup oil
1 cup boiling water or hot coffee (I used espresso)
2 eggs
Method:

  • Preheat the oven to 180°C. 
  • Spay two 23cm round cake pans or one 23x33cm rectangular baking pan with spray & cook. 
  • In a large bowl, mix the dry ingredients together.
  • Add the eggs, milk, oil and vanilla essence and beat with an electric mixer for about two minutes. 
  • Add the boiling water or coffee and mix until combined.
  • Pour the batter into the prepared pans and bake for 30-40 minutes.
  • To test if the cake is ready, insert a toothpick into the middle of the pan. If it comes out clean, the cake is ready. 
  • Use a knife around the edge of each cake to loosen it from the pan, turn the pan over onto a metal rack to cool.
When cooled completely, ice the cake with ganache or buttercream icing.  Enjoy!

Sunday 26 May 2013

It's true


Sunday nights all bring the same thing.  A feeling.  An emotion.  

If you had to choose a colour to describe it, only blue would suffice.  Sunday night blues happen.  

Maybe it's the feeling of a giant new week with many scary, unknown things approaching.  At a speed we cannot control.  The sweet cushion of the weekend inevitably melts and you are left with the down that follows a sugar rush.

The funny thing is that the antidote that works best (well, for me) is more sugar.  Some kind of sweet treat to soothe a bluesy heart.

Home


I travel a lot.  Not the kind of travel that promotes fun pictures on your wall - although I have done some of that.  The other day someone asked me where I was from.  And that got me thinking.  Where am I from?  I didn't grow up where I was born.  I didn't start my adult life where I grew up.  I moved to another country, and then moved to a different town in said country.  Soon after this, I moved to yet another country.  

I find myself wondering if I have been running away all this time.  Have I been looking for bigger, better things?  Have I achieved any of these things.  Now, whilst Sundays are often spent in church, reflecting the meaning of life and the maker of it, I find myself reflecting too.  

Is it possible that I have been searching for home?  And what defines home?  Is home where you were born, grew up, moved to, moved to or moved to?  Or shall I write that cheesy truth on all my forms, and admit that really, home is where the heart is?


Gorgeous shack (home) from Pips Photography

Tuesday 21 May 2013

Fixed.



It is possible.  You can benefit from meeting a friend even if it's the very last thing on earth you feel like doing.  Its possible that the little pep talk you have been needing to hear all day - that little judgement free pick-me-up - will only be found in that specific source.  That your one fix for the day will go unused if you cancel.  Especially if you cancel at the last minute.

I felt like cancelling today.  Sleep was mere seconds away when my phone rang.  First I felt annoyed.  Then I answered.  The invitation was for coffee.  Nothing difficult or stressful or even remotely in need of too much brainpower.  But the land of sleep seemed far more appealing.

I had to drag myself with most of my will.  Needless to say that when I arrived, my mood was far less than sparkling.  But I went anyway.  Because a friend, a real one,  knows the ins and outs of who you are and how you feel and generally doesn't really mind if you are a bit off.

And, after the first 5 minutes and half a chai latte the pep-talk was given (never in a way that feels like a pep talk) and I started to feel more and more polished.  It is possible that  friends are the most wonderful things ever.  And that they fulfil a specific need.  The need to have ourselves polished and appreciated.  And fixed.

Monday 13 May 2013

Pumped

Often you can't find shoes that you love, no matter how much you walk around.  Enter the beauty of online shopping.  For the love of shoes (comfortable ones for a change), here is a collection of pumps that stole my heart..........







Gorgeous yellow pumps from Zando, black ballerinas from ASOS, nauticals and greens from Next, sparkly from Style 36, pink and tan from Sarie, fushia at H&M, red heart dot from Mr Price.




Saturday 11 May 2013

One the edge

Do you ever have the dream where you find yourself standing on the edge somewhere.  And you have to decide.  Will you jump?  Will you turn around?  Will you run?

When emotion overtakes all reasoning and heart is all that counts - will you listen?  When that perfect day finally arrives - will you be strong enough to jump?

My friend is standing on the edge this morning.  Dressed is perfect white.  Beaming.  


Gorgeous bouquet from ideas from here.


Monday 6 May 2013

Rules



A friend posted this great piece of  happiness advice on Facebook and it really spoke to me.  Especially the part about freeing your mind from worries.  I like to obsess and think and get stuck on things.  I wonder if I should try to apply these rules like a new-years resolution.  But maybe call it a new life/outlook resolution?

Saturday 4 May 2013

Wake me slowly

It has long been a Saturday tradition in my house.  The slow morning.  There is something delicious about being awake with nowhere to go.  Nowhere but a venture out for breakfast.

This morning, we went to one of my favourite places.  L'Epicerie makes me smile.  Delicious croissants, good coffee, speciality deli items imported from France.  What's not to like?

So, in the spirit of slow awakenings, we had our morning croissant, coffee and great company - even if we didn't say much.


Friday 3 May 2013

Panic

Earlier today, the king of the jungle and I decided it would be nice to go and play in the garden downstairs.  Now, king Pikpik is no lion.  He is a small furry, loving bunny.  I picked him and my phone up and we headed outside.  Initially he just sat with me and pretended to be afraid of the new surroundings.  What a great actor.  We regularly came to play, so I nudged him to get on with it.   I had plans.  And, only a sample of a new book on my kindle app.  45 minutes later, having finished said sample, I decided it was time to go back upstairs.  For a little while I enjoyed chasing the king around.  He obviously loved it.  

An hour later, having used carrots and apples as lures, he was still running away from me.  I started to panic.  What if I couldn't catch him and he became a wild bun?  My heart couldn't bear the thought.  I prayed.  I pleaded.  Finally I decided to lie down next to him.  I spoke quietly, offering blades of grass.  And after half an hour of lying in the sand and grass, he just let me pick him up.  

The wonderful thing is that my sweet bunny could feel my panic.  And it drove him away.  When I finally gave up and spent some time face to face with him, he relaxed and let me take him home. 



Thursday 2 May 2013

Say it


With Mother's day looming (12 May),  I find myself looking at pretty pictures and wishing, more than anything, that I could be with my mom this year.  It's not that we need a day to remember who our mothers are.  We know how important they are in our lives.  They hold our hands, they dream and pray for us.  

Mother's day doesn't serve to remind us how important our mothers are to us.  Really, it is there to remind the mothers in our lives that they are important.   Celebrate your mom, be it flowers, cards, chocolates or pampering.  The most important thing is to make her understand what she means to you.  Say it.





              Beautiful tin can arrangement form here.

Little umbrellas....

When people find out that you live on an island, they automatically assume that you spend your days lounging on the beach, sipping cocktails with little umbrellas.  They are surprised, if not offended, if your tan is not darker than theirs.  They almost expect you to walk around with sand in your hair, car, handbag.

In actual fact, if us islanders are honest, we don't spend nearly enough time on the beach.

This May day, however, we packed the car, made sarmies, chilled the beer (sorry, no cocktails) and made our way down to the beach.  As we pitched our big umbrella and settled in for the day, we couldn't help but wonder:  "We live on an island.  Why don't we do this more often?"






Tuesday 30 April 2013

Heart

Being a lady of leisure affords me plenty of time for things that others may not see as such a treat.  Like spending hours looking for pretty things to fill my house up with.  This morning, on my usual hunt, I came across this darling milk jug.  Milk jugs have been a favourite of mine for a while now.  It may not make sense to anybody, but that's ok.  This little jug is from kamers vol geskenke.   The red heart automatically gives it extra points.  But, what really got to me was the message on it.  "My head says, Who Cares?  But then my heart whispers, you do, stupid".  How wonderfully true of everyday life.  How often do we try to convince ourselves that things don't matter.  That we can shrug bad experiences off like they never happened.  Who cares?  The unavoidable truth is that we do.  Because we have the one thing that makes each of us who we are.  Heart.

Monday 29 April 2013

Souper

The best kind of recipe is one that inspires you, but still leaves room for you to play.  This is a recipe in the spirit of such inspiration and my love for soup.

Ingredients
- 2 onions, chopped
- 5 cups of vegetables, chopped (I used broccoli, beetroot and carrots)
- 7 cups of water (or enough to cover the vegetables)
- 2 chicken or vegetable stock cubes
- 2 teaspoons of mixed herbs
- half a cup of cream (optional but recommended)
- salt & pepper to taste

Brown the onions in a large bot.  Add the vegetables and brown.  Add water, stock cubes, herbs, salt & pepper. Bring to the boil and simmer until everything is soft - usually about 30minutes.

Blend (add the cream at this stage) & enjoy.








Hearing voices

Over a cup of coffee, many things can be solved.  Even if two friends are far apart.  Emails can speak.  How often do you hear your friends voice when reading emails from her?  Before you know it, the voice in your head, has had a cup or two with you.  Here's to things that keep us going : coffee and great friendships.